Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Aftermath of a hot seat....

This past Sunday I had my turn in the hot seat in my Creation Circle.  This is where I got the opportunity to have the others in my circle focus in on a specific problem I'm having and get help/support for this issue.  Now, leading up to the meeting I had more than a few conversations with my "coach" to help nail down the issue so that discussing the issue will be of value to everyone in the group.  While we started with how I can get rather emotional, we did get a little digging to get a bit deeper into the issue.

The issue I decided upon was my issue of self-confidence.  Now, if I'm in my comfort zone, I'll rarely have confidence issues as I can feel like King Kong in those places most of the time.  At other times, I may struggle whether this is in starting a conversation, introducing myself, or opening up in some cases.  Now, just before the hot seat, there were some exercises done as part of the meeting around getting our needs met that in a way overlapped with this that was a bit creepy.  Perhaps it is just a divine hand guiding things along that makes it seem really weird that things line up so well here and that is what threw me.  In the dyad I had, I got to share some of my background on this and got some interesting feedback.  In a way, it was the kind of kick I needed and served me quite well in being prepared for the hot seat.

Part of my time there was explaining the issue which I'd reckon is typical.  What I managed to get from this group was some amazing insights and ideas that will really help a great deal.  The idea of confidence being built instead of found was definitely something to shift my frame of reference.  That I tend to go for external validation at times was another useful point.  I do have the work of going through all my different groups to see which are the ones that feed me and which are the ones that drain me.  Last but not least is the idea of honoring myself.  This was tended to throw my stomach into knots which I could take as a sign of being an issue to work through soon.  Why would I have an issue with celebrating the awesomeness that I am?  Lots of different ideas come to mind though what if I just did things for myself to find what works to be ways of acknowledging that I am great at times.

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