Sunday, July 18, 2010

So much to do, so little time...

Now, I am starting to go through the book, "Mind Over Mood," which I'm hoping will help me work through some of my issues regarding relationships, depression, anxiety and stuff. My emotional compass as I call it, is likely near one of my top priorities in a sense but I'm starting to see how this may go a different way. By emotional compass, I mean that automatic reaction in certain situations such as being told to "Take it easy," "Relax," or "Calm down," where I tend to have this disappointment and anger reaction generally. The disappointment is sadness over messing up and feeling bad and unworthy, while the anger is a self-loathing and critical. Now, initially I had the thought that this is something to correct and fix, but now I'm starting to think there is a way to let those initial reactions wash over me and see if that helps get me back on track which I'm starting to hope would be a better course of action to try.

I also recently finished reading "The Introvert's Advantage" which showed me how in some ways I really am quite introverted yet at the same time not quite the uber introvert I thought I was. I go to various social events where the key is that the focus of that event is something that interests me, whether this be a few games of Euchre or discussions on various philosophical ideas that intrigue me. The structure of these meetings are part of what I rely on to get out of my shell and participate within a certain structure, part of which stems from my Judging preference in MBTI. In its own way, I find it quite interesting to investigate the various parts of myself and knowing what I have and am in various ways.